Friday, August 9, 2013

Where I belong

I always thought by the time I was about 24 I would have my $h*t together, I would be married, have some awesome job, my own home and be driving a cool car.  I didn't think it would take me till I was 28 years old to finally find where I belong.

I really struggled last year with my career and trying to find a place where I belonged.  Last year was the happiest and the saddest time of my life.  My job was beyond stressful, my grandpa was dying, I was planning my wedding and I just couldn't keep it together half the time.  I tried so hard not to let my personal life affect my job but it was just too much for me to handle.  Most of my co-workers were very supportive and encouraging but it was difficult to have a boss that I sometimes did not see eye to eye with and who often made me feel like my best was not good enough.  Every day I walked on eggshells just praying that I wouldn't be made to feel bad about a mistake or something that had not gone as planned.  I know I've written before about the work trip I took just two weeks before my wedding and how awful those five days were; I believe it was then that I finally hit my breaking point.  I was totally pushed over the edge when my grandfather died while I was on my honeymoon and was made to feel bad about needing to miss two additional days of work.  My boss didn't even bother to come to the viewing, nor did anyone else from my work - that really hurt me a lot.  I cried on my way home from work more times than I care to think about, I dreaded getting up and going to work and found myself slowly loosing my passion.

I did a lot of soul searching after the fall and realized that I needed to make a change.  I could not continue to feel that way I did about my job and I knew I had a lot of potential that would be well used at most any company.  My main goal was to find a place to work that had good benefits, the ability to possibly flex my hours and a shorter commute.  I started looking and quickly had many promising interviews for various positions.  All of them sounded interesting and exciting to me and at one time I almost had to decide between three different jobs.  Thankfully one of them did not work out, so I was down to two positions.  I could not be happier with the decision that I made.  I honestly love my job, I love the people I work with (especially my boss), I love working on a college/medical center campus, I love all of the room to grow and opportunities to expand my education and it doesn't hurt that the benefits are outstanding and my drive is much shorter.

I learned a lot last year and really found out who I was as a professional.  I honestly feel like a totally different person since starting my new job and I feel like for once in my life things have fallen into place.  I'm married to the man of my dreams who would do anything to make me happy, my family and friends are always so supportive of my decisions and now I'm about to be a mother, how much better could things get!

I can't imagine where I would be without all of the up's and down's I have had in the last year.  Though the struggle was hard, it's so amazing to feel like I have a place where I finally belong.  

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