FIVE on Friday

This week has been crazy, difficult and exhausting....

ONE: As you may have already read, we had our dog put down on Monday.  It was one of the hardest things I have ever done.  So far this week I've called out for her to come eat food off the floor, worried about getting home to let her out and cried when we got a sympathy card from our vet.  I've cried more times than that too.  Life is so different without her and a piece of my heart went with her when she left us.

TWO: I've actually been pretty good about working out over the last two weeks.  I've been doing a hybrid of TurboFire and PiYo which I think is going to help kick my butt into gear.  My diet is slowly getting better.  The first major step was giving up my morning Starbucks run.  I've also given up fried foods and fast food for lent.  

THREE: Winter is an ugly thing for many people this year, central Ohio has been no exception.  It's -9 right now and tomorrow we could get 3-7 inches of snow on top of the 3-5 that are already on the ground.  I have a playdate planned for tomorrow, but may have to cancel if the weather is bad.  Last weekend I missed my nieces birthday party on Saturday because of near white out conditions.....

View from my front porch Saturday at noon

FOUR: Andrew started his new job last Friday and things are going well.  He has gotten back into the groove of things and I think he will do very well with this job change.  I can already tell that his stress level has decreased and he just seems like a happier person.  It's amazing what getting rid of job stress can do for a person.  I'm so proud of him for making this change because I know it was not easy for him.  

FIVE: I'm super addicted to online shopping right now and have been scoring a lot of good deals.  I have also found that searching for online coupon codes can save me even more money, Retail Me Not is my favorite site for coupon codes.  I've been trying hard not to spend so much, but Jeanette doesn't have many 18 month clothes and I'm on the hunt for good deals!  So far I scored some adorable outfits from a Carters President's Day sale and snagged some Toms for her on Zulily.  I plan to take some of her birthday money to Once Upon a Child in the next couple of weeks to find her some used clothes.

Goodbye dear friend

Today we said goodbye to our dear, sweet basset hound Bessie.  She was about 16 years old.  Last week, we noticed she wasn't eating as well took her to the vet and got her on some medicine for a tooth infection.  We figured she would get back to feeling better and everything would be okay.  Then she stopped eating and drinking, she got sick fast and we knew there wasn't much we could do.  We took her into the vet this morning and said our goodbyes, we cried and held her and told her how much we loved her and how much she would be missed.  It was probably one of the hardest things I've ever had to do.

Bessie was your typical basset hound, smart (maybe too smart), smelly, noisy, lazy and a great family dog.  She adored Andrew since he rescued her from near death when he got out of high school.  She was tied up with another dog, had a broken leg and was almost starved to death.

When we first started dating, she did everything with us.  We used to walk down to the McDonald's in town and get her a little cup of ice cream, take her out on the boat, go for nice walks picnics and even camping.  She loved a mild spring day, taking a sun bath, sleeping, stealing food or begging for food, following her snout and just being loved.

7 years ago when I first met Bessie

The day Bessie came back home, Jeanette was about a week old.

I found this lovely poem and wanted to share.

   So this is where we part, My Friend, 

   and you'll run on, around the bend,

   gone from sight, but not from mind, 

   new pleasures there you'll surely find.

   I will go on, I'll find the strength, 

   life measures quality, not its length.

   One long embrace before you leave, 

   share one last look, before I grieve.

   There are others, that much is true,

   but they be they, and they aren't you. 

   And I, fair, impartial, or so I thought, 

   will remember well all you've taught.

   Your place I'll hold, you will be missed,

   the fur I stroked, the nose I kissed. 

   And as you journey to your final rest, 

   take with you this...I loved you best.

"I loved you best" - by Jim Willis

One year photos

I will keep this one light on the text so you can enjoy the photos from Jeanette's one year photo shoot!

This dress and the next one were mine
when I was little :)

One of my mom's friends made her birthday hat.

I think it's safe to say Jeanette likes cake!

Working mom - one year later

I took nearly three months of maternity leave when Jeanette was born last year and I struggled with the idea of being a working mom.  We found a great sitter, Andrew adjusted his work schedule, my mom adjusted her schedule to watch Jeanette one day a week and I had a few back up plans for care.  I talked to my boss and we came up with a flexible work agreement so that I could work from home one day per week.  I was anxious to go back to work, but the adjustment was not easy.

When I first came back, I was still pumping and my supply started to dwindle.  I took two breaks a day to pump and everyone in my office was great about giving me the time.  But I was stressed, and after a month my supply was gone.  I tried the tea, supplements and even a prescription from my doctor (which sent my emotions over the edge and made my energy level tank).  I beat myself up a lot but decided that formula was the best decision for our family and my sanity.

First day at the sitter

My morning routine for a few months
Decaf Starbucks, pumping, to-do list writing

I slowly got back into the groove of work, child care pickups and occasional sleepless nights.  Where I feel behind, was keeping up on the cleaning, cooking and general daily chores.  When I came home, all I wanted to do was be with Jeanette and I didn't have much desire to get things done.  I gained back some of the weight I lost from nursing (and then some) and fell into a slump.  It's hard not to beat yourself up when you're a mom and even harder when you're a working mom.  You want to be perfect (or maybe that's just me, since I'm type A and a little obsessive), you want to be the best mom, the best employee, the best wife, cook and housekeeper.  But there are nights, like the one below, when you just pass out on the couch after feeding the baby.  There are days when dinner is whatever you can find in the deep freeze that isn't expired or fast food.  

I often question how our family has made this all work and yes, I've had days where I wanted to throw up my hands and say "I quit" but somehow I keep on going.

On a typical day:
I wake up between 5:15 and 5:30am, feed the cat and dog and get in the shower
Get dressed and ready, leave a note for Andrew if he needs to take something to the sitter and I'm out the door by 6:20am

I get to work at 7am and start my day, some days I have lots of meetings, some days I have none.  What I do at work often changes from day to day.

Around 11am it's time for lunch and I try to make a healthy choice in the hospital cafeteria if I didn't pack, which is usually soup and a salad.

At 3:30pm it's time to leave, every day but Mondays and Thursdays I pick Jeanette up from the sitter, I usually get home between 4:30 and 4:45pm.  I get Jeanette settled in the living room, feed the dog and figure out what to make for dinner.  

By 6pm, we are all sitting down to eat.  It's great that Jeanette can eat dinner with us at the same time and we don't have to try and entertain her while we eat.  This also means that we are eating at the table together more, which is good!

After dinner the meal gets cleaned up and lunches are packed.  We watch the national news, Jeopardy and Wheel of Fortune (which happens to be Jeanette's favorite show, I think it's because there's lots of clapping, bright colors and fun noises).  We don't always watch the whole show because most nights, she get's a bath.  

Around 8pm Jeanette goes to bed and I try to get in a workout or some time on the elliptical.  If I don't workout, I will do some light cleaning or laundry.  From 8:30ish to 10:30pm, you can find Andrew and I watching TV.  I'm usually reading while we watch or doing Sudoku.  I rarely stay up past 10:30, even on the weekends.   

Rinse and repeat - Monday through Friday.

As crazy as this schedule sounds, things are about to get even more crazy!  Andrew is starting a new job on Friday and I am going to have to change my work hours so that I can pick up and drop off Jeanette at the sitter.  I feel blessed to work for a place where the HR office supports flexible working hours for those with families or other life situations that make them unable to be in the office for 40 hours a week.  I'm still trying to figure out how we are going to do it all, but I'm sure we will find a way to make it work.

Even a year in, I'm not sure that I have it all together as a working mom, but you better believe I am trying hard!

At the end of a long work day.

Jeanette - one year old

Jeanette didn't have her one year pediatrician appointment until February 5th, so I decided to wait until then to post her stats.  I still cannot believe that she is a year old!

Height: 31 inches (98th percentile)

Weight: 21 pounds even (75th percentile)

Clothes/Diapers:  Little miss is wearing mostly all 12 month clothes and 18 month sleepers since she's so tall.  She's still in a size 3 diaper.  She has small, skinny feet like her momma and I have a hard time finding her shoes, she can still wear some size 2 or 2.5 baby shoes which range from 6 months to 12 months for a guideline.

Sleep: Jeanette is still the worlds most amazing sleeper.  She sleeps through the night from 8pm till 7am and takes two naps.  I have a feeling she may go down to one nap soon, but I'm not going to push her.  She still likes to suck her thumb before she falls asleep.

Feedings:  We are officially done with bottles, which I find hard to believe but I'm happy at the same time.  No more buying formula and no more bottle washing!  Jeanette now gets oatmeal in the morning when she wakes up along with a sippy cup of whole milk.  She gets a morning snack around 9:30 and lunch at noon.  I've also been giving her milk before her afternoon nap.  It's great that she can eat dinner at the same time we do now so we don't have to worry about entertaining her while we eat!  She also gets some milk before bed at night.  Jeanette LOVES to eat and is all about self feeding, though we are still working on using utensils.

Worst Moment(s): The shots/finger prick at her one year appointment here awful!  I have not seen her scream that hard in a very long time and she was pretty crabby the rest of the day.  I finally got her to fall asleep in the car after offering her some milk and puffs.

Best Moment(s): There are probably too many to name for this month.  I think from 9 months on, we've really been able to see her personality develop.  I think we may have a daddy's girl on our hands as well, she lights up when Andrew walks into the room and immediately wants him to hold her.

Development:  Jeanette has been cruising on the furniture since Thanksgiving but doesn't seem quite ready to let go just yet and walk.  I read that kids who are excellent crawlers walk later and I think she falls into this category.  Other development: talking (dada, mama, uh-oh, kitty, dog, hi, no), rolling a ball back and forth, handing over her toys, playing peek-a-boo either with her hands or putting an object in front of her face, standing unassisted for a minute or two, identifying things by pointing.

Jeanette Likes: Food, the cat and the dog, books, dancing to music, sticking her fingers in your ears and mouth/pulling hair, walking while holding your hands, bath time.

Jeanette Dislikes: There isn't much I can put her anymore, she loves most everything!

Enjoying her first piece of birthday cake. 

Sneak peek from her one year photos with Erica Pitcock Photography.

Enjoying some reading at a family dinner.

Thumb sucking

Harassing Bessie

Enjoying the fish at the doctor's office with daddy.

Sippy cup champ! 

Birthday pancakes at Grandma Sharon's!