Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Rollercoaster

So lately I must say things have been looking up for me, not that I'm trying to brag or anything, but there for a while I was really down and bummed. It took me almost 4 months to land the job I have now, my boss at my old job was not the nicest to me when I told her I was leaving, and she has not contacted me since I left.....whatever, her loss. School was on hold because of money and my dumb lack of motivation to finish and graduate, but thankfully that's gone by the wayside as well. I did have Andrew at that point and he has def. changed my life for the better and it was good to have his support when all that was going on. He has really motivated me to be a better person, to finish school, to save money and to just let go of the dumb things that bother me. Then I finally get a good job, salaried with benefits, paid time off and the works. I finally start to feel settled then things begin to erupt at home again.

I wish I could afford to move out....I honestly don't know how much more I can take. Its not that I hate my family, they just get bent out of shape over nothing. Most of you that know my mom know that she is a neat freak and is constantly on edge about the house being clean. My brother is in that moody late adolescent phase and he and his girlfriend fight constantly, creating turmoil within our house that has nothing to do with us. I get yelled at for not helping out, yet last night I made dinner, cleaned it all up, then went to visit my grandparents and that still was not enough.....like honestly, what the hell!

Now I don't know when Andrew and I will be able to move in together, which is fine, I know it will be okay for me to visit him often and I'd much rather make the drive to Westerville then out to West Jefferson.....its just more familiar to me. At any rate, I know that its now my turn to be totally supportive of him and what he needs to do and I just need to suck it up and go with it.

Once I get some debt paid off and get more settled with my job/school schedule in a few weeks I can see where I am at and see about moving out. Just keep me in your thoughts and prayers that I stay sane after all of this because I honestly don't know how much more myself or anyone in my family can take at this point!!!

2 comments:

Mel said...

I do not miss living with my parents. That's a hard part, especially after you've already been to school and experienced living without them. You develop your own groove, and they develop theirs, and then trying to mesh them again usually doesn't work very well. But I'm glad that so many other things in your life are looking up, like the job! Still trying to get all my paperwork done so hopefully I can bring in some money... you know, to support my family of 3....

Amanda said...

Yeah, trust me you know better than most how my family can be....its nuts!! And good luck on the job hunt, its a pretty frustrating process sometimes....I got really angry during my hunt and it really affected the rest of my life...but it will all fall into place. I suggest Columbusjobs.com and columbus.craigslist.org for searching!